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St. Mary Roman Catholic Church
New Britain, Connecticut |
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Fr. Salvatore Rosa What does it mean to follow Christ? What are the conditions for us of today who want to be his disciples? Jesus tells us, in today’s Gospel, the cost of following him, in three specific areas - relationships, suffering, and possessions. Relationships: “If anyone comes to me, without turning his back on father and mother, his wife and his children, his brothers and sisters, indeed his very self, he cannot be my disciple.” How does my relationship with another person get in the way of my relationship with Christ? Obviously if the other person is leading me into sin, then I need to straighten out the relationship or break it off . A man may have to say goodbye to his drinking buddies if being with them leads to drunkenness; a man and woman may have to say good-bye to each other, if their friendship is going to lead them to adulterous behavior. Any relationship that leads to sin, obviously interferes with our relationship with Christ. It’s easy to see that. But there are more subtle ways in which our relationships can be harmful. You are my friend, so I expect you to always take my side. Even if you see things differently, you have to agree with me. You have to make my enemies, your enemies. Or, you have to cover-up for me. I have a certain fault or weakness that I don’t want to face. I pretend it’s not there, and you as my friend, have to pretend it’s not there too. The minute you take me to task, or make me face my faults, you are no longer my friend. Or, I love you, but my love is oppressive, suffocating, clinging, possessive. I don’t want you to relate to anyone else; I want you to need me, to depend on me for everything.
In all of those ways, our relationships can be less than they should be.
If you are my friend, you have the right to speak the truth to me, to take me to
task, to help me face things I don’t want to see. In our relationships we
should be helping each other grow into the persons we should be. Friendship
means keeping each other honest. My love for you shouldn’t be a way of dominating you, controlling you, of making you weak and dependent, but of strengthening you, freeing you, enabling you to realize more fully your potential. That’s the kind of love and friendship that strengthens our relationship to Christ. Suffering: We all like to have our lines as free from suffering and pain as possible. In fact, many people think that a life without problems is a sign of God’s blessing. They strike a bargain with God, as it were, and tell Him - I’ll do my part by obeying your laws and commandments; you do your part by making sure nothing bad ever happens to me. But suffering is an unavoidable part of human existence. Christ certainly sees it that way. He says: “Anyone who does not take up his cross and follow me, cannot be my disciple.” The cross is part of every Christian life. It takes many forms. Sometimes it is physical illness. Sometimes it is the loss of a beloved person. Sometimes it is the pain of saying no to our selfish desire, of learning discipline and self control, or of persevering in the face of life’s harsh disappointments. The cross is always there. Sometimes, straightening out our mixed up relationships is the source of our suffering. Relationships are often the cross in our lives. Possessions: “None of you can be my disciple if he does not renounce all of his possessions.” That doesn’t mean that we all go out and throw away everything we have. It does mean that we don’t measure our worth by the things we have. My bankbook doesn’t make be better or worse than anyone else. It doesn’t give me security or life. God created material goods so that all his sons and daughters could sustain themselves and provide for their needs. But it is not God’s will that a few should be excessively rich, and the vast majority should be miserably poor. He created the world and its goods for all his sons and daughters. Renouncing possessions means using my goods, money, to help others; it means realizing that people are more important than things; it means sharing with others according to their need and my ability. The way we handle possessions, suffering, and relationships, brings us closer to Christ or further away from him. By our struggle in those three areas we pay the cost of being his disciple.
Mail to: franceswei@saintmarynb.org with questions and commands |
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